Monday, February 27, 2017

what has happened to me?


howareya? to start this...?

well, I am still a person. 

I'm still a baker, so that's good. 

I bake at Lodge Bread in los angeles. 

and I've continued to make lots of cakes. 

it's been a strange time for me, a strange few years really. 

I've struggled in lots of areas. energy, motivation, overwhelming mental paralysis. struggled with being nice to myself and treating a body the way bodies should be treated. I realized how hard I feel things. whatever things. how personally I take everything, criticism, scolding. how my head hangs onto those things with a claw grip. I've struggled with topics of mental health, with different diagnoses, with medications, with self-medication. 

and honestly, that's the reason I slipped away from here. at whatever point, something had shifted in me.  my writing was different, my voice had morphed. and it felt uncomfortable to make such a switch, to introduce such a swampiness to this thing I had worked on for years, the lighthearted place I created and loved. 

I began to crave something new, a fresh start. somewhere I could feel free to be a depressing cynical little shit.

this leads us to wolfie cake. I started it with no expectations, and urged myself to a place of comfortable un-censorship. 
there's lots of dessert. there's a lot of color, fun cakes and oozy glazes.
and I'm happy to say that it's turned into such a pleasant little space and greatest of all, it feels like me. 

this is where you'll find me now

luv you.


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